“He’s a pinball wizard
There has to be a twist
A pinball wizard’s got such a supple wrist”– The Who, “Pinball Wizard”
As far as arcade games go, nothing is older than pinball. It’s roots go all the way back to the early 18th Century, in where it share the same common ancestor as the Japanese pachinko machine. Video games may have been everywhere in the 1980s – the pizza parlor; the bowling alley; the movie theatre; the candy store; the deli, but the pinball machine was in the arcades before the advent of the video game, and outlasted them when home consoles began to match and supersede the graphics quality and economic value of their arcade machine counterparts. The few remaining arcades today still feature many games of skill – the crane; skee ball; mini basketball; the dance and DJ simulators; racing games; and shoot ’em ups – but there are little to no variety. The IPs may change, but the game mechanics hardly ever change. Sadly, the pinball is not an exception; it too peaked creatively in the early 2000s.
Hey, I promised and teased this for a very long time now. Let’s put this baby to rest.
I remember when I was seven years old, at a hotel arcade, I was looking for a pinball machine to play when a Pac-Man cabinet caught my eye. The circle was completed ten years later, when I was at my favorite arcade looking for a Tetris machine when a pinball machine caught my eye.
During the entire decade of the 90s, my second home was the arcade. From high school, college, and my early post-college career, most of my free time was spent at an arcade. And since I sucked at fighting games, you would probably find me playing a pinball machine. I went from being a lurker, finishing games for players who left their machine mid-game, to a person who let lurkers finish my games – mainly due to time restraints.
Due to the decline of arcades, I more or less stopped playing pinball somewhere in the early 2000s. Please correct me if I’m wrong, but from the few machines I’ve seen made after 2007, I haven’t seen much differences in regards to upgrades or features from those made between 1990 – 2006. Nor have I’ve seen any original concepts from 21st century machines; nothing but IPs (i.e.: movies, TV shows, sports teams, music groups). Sure, the majority of pinball machines have based off of IPs for the past ninety years. My point is that during the Golden Age, the gameplay and mechanics had an uniqueness that tied into the game’s title. It is my impression that the major game designers have settled into a single formula and just plug and play the particular characters/plot points/theme music into the game.
Tl;dr: it’s no coincidence my list is mainly from the 90s. It was their Golden Age, and it serendipitously overlapped with my coming of age.
Without further ado…
The I, Omnibus Top 10 Favorite Pinball Machines
(images courtesy of arcade-museum.com, unless otherwise noted)
10. PIN*BOT (1986, Williams)
This game stood out from all other machines at the arcades – arcade and pinball alike. It was one of the first games to introduce the multiball feature. The multi-color targets was original for the mid-80s. It also had vocals that were reminiscent of Berzerk. There was a sequel, The Machine Bride of Pinbot, which came out in 1991. It deserves an Honorable Mention. The original was ahead of its time. The sequel was of its time – very good, but nothing that stood out from its contemporaries.
9. Scared Stiff (1996, Midway)
The game featured Elvira, Mistress of the Dark, a.k.a. Cassandra Peterson. The bonus games are named after the type of “B” movies she would host on TV. I remember one of the bonus games would reference “Funkytown”, which always made me smile.
8. Cyclone (1988, Williams)
One of the two amusement park themed games on my list. It is one of the earlier pinball games that had it all – skill shot, bonus games, ramps, and multiball. In this “amusement park,” The Cyclone was the featured roller coaster ride. But there were other “rides” featured here: The other coaster, The Comet; the Spook House; and the Ferris Wheel. It also featured a barker that that instructed you to go on these rides, and I can still recall those audio files to this day. “RIIIDE THE FERRIS WHEEL! RIIIDE THE COMET!”
7. Junk Yard (1996, Williams)
One of the most original concepts I’ve ever seen in a pinball game. This is what I mean when I say that they don’t make ’em like this anymore. The concept is that you are trapped in a junkyard owned by an evil prick named Bob. You have to MacGyver your way out by combining different pieces of junk. Every time you obtain an item, you are advised by an angel and devil. The bonus games were great – from shooting bread at the junkyard dog, Spike, with a toaster gun, to your escape by going into outer space. There is a wrecking ball (another pinball attached to a chain ) in the upper part of the playfield that can either hinder you or help you (in multiball). This was one of the first pinball games I won so I was able to maximize my time with one credit due to all the replays I was able to achieve.
6. Creature From The Black Lagoon (1993, Bally Midway)
The title is kind of misleading since the actual concept is about being at a 1950s drive-in movie theatre. But there is a really cool 3D hologram image of the titular character in the middle of the playfield. The background music is instrumental versions of popular rock and roll songs from that era. Who knew that drive-ins would make a comeback in 2020?
5. The Getaway: High Speed II (1992, Williams)
Five words. ZZ Top. “La Grange”. I was naive at the time.This was my introduction to that song. I had no clue what is was about. I just loved that guitar solo. But what balls Williams had to use a song about a whorehouse for a pinball game. Or any game whatsoever. The other main feature was the fact that it had a gear shift for a plunger. The early 90s was the pinnacle of rock songs featured in pinball games. Many did not match the tone of the game. Yes, I’m looking at you Queensryche’s “Real World” and the Last Action Hero pinball. You would think this wouldn’t either. Yet somehow it does.
4. FunHouse (1990, Williams)
The other amusement park based pinball on my list. The large ventriloquist dummy’s head at the top of the playfield is named Rudy. And fun fact, he is voiced by Ed Boon. Yes, the co-creator of Mortal Kombat is the voice of Scorpion and this high-pitched carnie. This man can taunt gamers in any octave. Others may have the ninja’s, “Get over here” stuck in their heads, but for me, it’s “FunHouse?! HAHAHAHAHA!” Maybe the gameplay mechanics were no better than its contemporaries, but nothing was more satisfying that getting that pinball into Rudy’s open mouth.
3. Twilight Zone (1993, Bally Midway)
One of the most complex and difficult pinball game ever.Tons of features, perhaps too many. Oodles and oodles of references to the original 1959-1964 series. For the longest time, I believed that they were using Rod Serling’s actual voice. But it is actually Tim Kitzrow, the voice of NBA Jam, NFL Blitz, and many other games. Now I wish we had Rod say, “Boom Shaka Laka!” You how I talked about rock songs in pinball. This game appropriately uses the instrumental of Golden Earring’s classic, “Twilight Zone” as the background music. Any other title I would complain about the high value of luck and demanding skill level required to win, but considering the title, I believe the challenge is appropriate and goes with Sterling’s original vision.
2. Star Wars Pinball (1992, Data East)
For me, this was the easiest game for me to master on this list. For some reason, I was able to hit the ramp shots over and over with little to no difficulty. Let’s just say that in 1993, if I wan’t in the computer lab chatting on Usenet’s alt.tv.animaniacs, I was in the campus center playing Star Wars Pinball. (I would have also been playing NBA Jam, but that cabinet was always taken.) I am not ashamed to admit that it is rated this high because I am a GenXer, and this is based on the original trilogy. But if have been following this blog, it’s no surprise a Star Wars based game would rank somewhere in the top three. I’d love to meet and chat with a Gen-Y, Millennial, or Gen-Z that does play pinball, because they would be the true unicorns. And they can argue about the 2000 Episode I pinball, or the 2017 pinball version made by Stern.
1. The Addams Family (1992, Bally Midway)
The most popular. The most profitable. The most quotable pinball game ever. Easy to learn, difficult to master. This machine had it all. And unlike most other pinball machines, this one used the voices of the actual actors from the movie, in this case, Raul Julia and Anjelica Huston. And while other machines broke due to overly complex and delicate features like oscillating guns on the side of the playfield (looking at you, Star Trek: The Next Generation), or tilting too much because playing shake the machine too hard (yes, you too #3 on this list, Twilight Zone), this would break down solely because of the wear and tear of playing it so often.I know you’re surprised an iconoclast like me would make the obvious #1 pick my #1 pick. But hey, I love this game too. It brings back a lot of good memories, and I will proudly add my voice to the majority in this instance.
Feel free to add your favorites in the comments. Does anyone have any recommendations when I make it out to an arcade and pinball museum?
I, Omnibus 